It will be a long journey i know…
for this have been staying in a hidden corner of my heart for years.
not until today i try to dig it out and look into it.

thanks Dad – you are always my light when I feel lost….

Probably I should consider the idea of seeking spiritual help from God at this point of my life.
yea I will do it!


well. time for updates!

life have been so busy these days that rarely have time to reflect on myself. it seems to me that i am occupied by SOMETHING at all times, but it’s like something i can’t tell exactly what it is; its not just about schoolwork. can i just do nothing right now but just meditate? anyways.

i have been enjoying my last semester. i like the courses i am taking. i like the new friends i am meeting and they are really lovely i have to say. and i find a new ME. throughout these years i have been changing a lot – my flow of thoughts are fluctuating all the time, negatively and positively. i admitted that i have been wasting a lot of time in self-accusation, or sometimes even accuse others for my own distress (which is so mean.) i prefer staying alone all times since i don’t wanna get involved/touch/hear about the ‘sensitive’ side of me. the reason is that i cant accept the reality. i seek for perfectionism. BUT now, i am trying to appreciate things happening around me (trying hard not to make comparison which is really hard for me). I like to stay with friends, share my mo liu stories…what i realize is, the day would be better even something bad happened. so why so serious?

and i bet ten years from now what distress you now will be nothing more than a joke. HA-HA